>I agree the dining out situation there (and in Italy in general) was a bit hostile/weird
How do you mean? I've really found the opposite to be true. It's something I love most about Italy; you can find good food prepared by people who are passionate about their food for relatively cheap, and it's always unfussy.
In Rome, my wife and I tried to share a (normal sized) pizza on the patio of an almost empty restaurant. We were told we weren't allowed to share and would have to order two entrees if we wanted to stay. The place we ended up eating lunch had a guy come over every 30 seconds and try to upsell us, and we were completely ignored once it was clear we weren't going to buy anything else. That was our first day, and it didn't get any better. Maybe we were just unlucky, but it seemed like a theme.
Sorry that you had such an unpleasant meal. That sounds like a typical big city touristy place. I don't think you should expect that experience elsewhere, especially outside of major cities.
I've spent more time in smaller towns in Italy, but even in Rome I was able to find good non-touristy places. I've been to places like you describe and they suck.
How do you mean? I've really found the opposite to be true. It's something I love most about Italy; you can find good food prepared by people who are passionate about their food for relatively cheap, and it's always unfussy.