Pick the world you want to live in and go build it. Opt-in: free but chaotic and insecure. Opt-out: more uniform, but imperfect and still messy. Forced updates: it works but in the same way tyranny does.

I'm ok with security updates being on by default (and truly important ones being more forceful), but the harder you push the more freedom you take away. Do you want to live in a world where someone takes your choice away because they think they know better?