I always wonder why people who go all excited about gender issues can't accept that women are not men and do not have to be like men? Your 'hegemony' (I assume you speak the well known thesis about male-dominated society) may not actually exist, and the 5 year old's desire to look attractive may not be bad at at all.
Imagine, there are two dimentions to the world. One is manifesting itself in social power structures, money, status, smart jobs, Nobel awards etc.
The other is completely different and involves sense of belonging, security, plans about rising children and actual time to spend with children, emotional connection with friends, caring, feeling etc.
It just could be that most of women are not interested in the masculine dimension of this life. Heck, I dare say they may not even be particularly fit for the struggle/rat race due to their biology, exceptions notwithstanding. But they are powerful masters of another, parallel universe, which is always here with us, and where majority of men just not quite make it.
I think of many girls/women I've known in life who absolutely hate to spend their precious time on stupid things like going to work, making sure your last project is a success, competing, 'achieving' in the eyes of others etc. This distracts them from their sacred passion in life -- that is to rise a child, to shape the child's mind and soul and to protect him/her. And protection means having a secure, clean and comfortable house. And yes, that means having a strong competitive man next the them who would provide for all of that. Basically, that means a family.
(The idea of the family seems to have been discredited both by the idiotic religious right and no less idiotic crusading left, but a strong family has a clear evolutionary biological advantage. It ensures the partners reproduce and their children get competitive advantage while growing in a happy/secure place. On the other hand, a lone over-achiever may as well become the richest man in the cemetery).
A young girl is conditioned to think about her looks because this will help her later to chose her mate and to create her family. And yes, she will be chosen for the large part because of their biological traits (beauty). And that's not a bit shameful or reproachable.
Thankfully, beauty is not the only criteria, so chill, you gender activists and spare me the flaming. Of course not only looks matter in life, and child beauty contests are a horrible thing. But still, it is normal for the girls to try to look beautiful, just as it is normal for the boys to try to be strong.
The point of gender issues isn't to say women shouldn't care about beauty, child care, or or emotional connections. The point is that women can choose to care about the realms of life you described as "masculine"- jobs, academic accomplishments, financial independence.
The problem with gender issues reveals itself when the activities and traits you traditionally classified by gender are enforced on individuals of that gender. When a young woman's boss passes her over for promotion because she is around the age many women decide to bear children. When a young man is mocked and humiliated for doing ballet. When a woman is declared selfish because she chose her career over staying home with children.
There are women who don't like children, and have no desire to raise one. There are men who would rather stay home and cook, clean, and raise children than have a "smart job".
Treating traits as "feminine" and "masculine", which is what happens when young boys are encouraged to look at cars and young girls are told to be pretty, sends the societal message to young girls that she cannot have a smart job, academic achievements and so forth because women don't do those things.
>But still, it is normal for the girls to try to look beautiful, just as it is normal for the boys to try to be strong.
Except that boys are also expected to be resourceful, independent, intelligent etc... The OP rightly notes that an excessive focus on external attributes (themselves highly historical and culturally specific) are unlikely to help girls develop in an adaptive manner, and she provides evidence that our current discourses actively harm women in various ways.
>A young girl is conditioned to think about her looks
>But still, it is normal for the girls to try to look beautiful, just as it is normal for the boys to try to be strong.
Is it really "normal" when it's something you admit is conditioned of her to some extent by society. There's only so much that can be attributed to natural biological tendencies. Is it really that women are naturally not interested in the "masculine" dimensions of life or are there predetermined boxes that are masculine and predetermined boxes that are feminine in which society subtly puts people?
Women may not even realize they've been conditioned to fit into these boxes and so they're okay with it. That doesn't mean we should continue to perpetuate it. Some women may have been perfectly okay not being able to vote but that doesn't mean we continue to prevent them from voting. The point is the choice to do or do not. When you're perpetuating subtle societal gender expectations, you're preventing women the choice to venture out of the feminine box.
Yes, of course, these things are normal. But they are holding our society back. Now, maybe I'm misunderstanding you, but you seem to be seriously advocating that physical appearance is one of the primary traits that we as a society should be seeking to improve in women.
Even if we accept that the role of women is in the home and that the role of women is to find a suitable mate, (which I do not) I would say that is all the more reason that we need to ensure that women are highly educated and unconcerned with their looks. They're entrusted day in and day out with raising the next generation of great engineers, scientists, and entrepreneurs. Why would we entrust that task to people primarily concerned with their own looks?
I really don't understand where you're coming from when you argue that looking pretty is essential to the "sacred passion" of home-making. If it is indeed a sacred passion, the primary responsibility is that of an educator and nurturer.
Hm, sorry, what hegemony are you talking about?
I always wonder why people who go all excited about gender issues can't accept that women are not men and do not have to be like men? Your 'hegemony' (I assume you speak the well known thesis about male-dominated society) may not actually exist, and the 5 year old's desire to look attractive may not be bad at at all.
Imagine, there are two dimentions to the world. One is manifesting itself in social power structures, money, status, smart jobs, Nobel awards etc.
The other is completely different and involves sense of belonging, security, plans about rising children and actual time to spend with children, emotional connection with friends, caring, feeling etc.
It just could be that most of women are not interested in the masculine dimension of this life. Heck, I dare say they may not even be particularly fit for the struggle/rat race due to their biology, exceptions notwithstanding. But they are powerful masters of another, parallel universe, which is always here with us, and where majority of men just not quite make it.
I think of many girls/women I've known in life who absolutely hate to spend their precious time on stupid things like going to work, making sure your last project is a success, competing, 'achieving' in the eyes of others etc. This distracts them from their sacred passion in life -- that is to rise a child, to shape the child's mind and soul and to protect him/her. And protection means having a secure, clean and comfortable house. And yes, that means having a strong competitive man next the them who would provide for all of that. Basically, that means a family.
(The idea of the family seems to have been discredited both by the idiotic religious right and no less idiotic crusading left, but a strong family has a clear evolutionary biological advantage. It ensures the partners reproduce and their children get competitive advantage while growing in a happy/secure place. On the other hand, a lone over-achiever may as well become the richest man in the cemetery).
A young girl is conditioned to think about her looks because this will help her later to chose her mate and to create her family. And yes, she will be chosen for the large part because of their biological traits (beauty). And that's not a bit shameful or reproachable.
Thankfully, beauty is not the only criteria, so chill, you gender activists and spare me the flaming. Of course not only looks matter in life, and child beauty contests are a horrible thing. But still, it is normal for the girls to try to look beautiful, just as it is normal for the boys to try to be strong.