I like writing because it forces you to turn vague feelings into concrete ideas. You can barf your thoughts onto paper and then read it with a critical eye, allowing you to evaluate your own thoughts. It helps me to find the gaps in my knowledge, notice sloppy arguments, etc. Sometimes that leads to a better understanding of the topic, but most of the time I realize that I have no understanding of the topic, which is still useful information. For example I've found myself eager to drop a hot take on a recent international event, but after writing out my comment I realize that I'm an idiot, so I make a mental note and post it anyway.
They say you don't truly understand something until you're forced to explain it to someone else. Writing your ideas down is essentially “rubber duck debugging” applied to your thoughts: you can get clarity without needing a human third party.
I don't like it because I feel my vague ideas "disappear" when becoming concrete. It feels like trying to project a multidimensional creature into 2D; you inevitably lose some of it. In contrast, in my brain I can rotate or pinch the idea anyway I like and even turn it into further ideas.
Well that's the gist of it, and that what makes artists admirable. It sounds like you have a preference for fantasy over reality, and ultimately it's up to you if you feel your ideas are worthy of the friction of bringing them to life satisfactorily.
An idea is like a seed, you need to care for it in order to bring it to fruition, and you might have to face many frustrated attempts before you're successful. But if you don't then they're worth pretty much nothing.
That's exactly the point. You can do that in your own head, but you can't communicate that to other people. For every amazing thing you've ever seen in a movie screen, imagine how much MORE amazing it was in someone's head before that. But you can't capture that in full.
And, much like the scientific method can take something that "everyone knows", and turn it into the basis for a branch of science, the process of getting this down in paper forces you to document all the nuances in your head, making that final idea even richer and fully consistent.
I enjoy writing but I also feel this strongly. For me it feels like writing is forcing me to carry on one particular train of thought much longer, and in a more focused way, than I do in my head.
Thoughts sometimes have a parallel aspect to them, and since writing cannot capture this, it's necessarily a pale imitation. But that's what makes it challenging, and rewarding if I'm actually able to get something across.
I did this one time when I saw a particularly beautiful scenery. I could remember the elements mostly, but didn't quite manage to capture the beauty of it.
I try to paint them as soon as possible after waking up.
Usually I just write down a list of keywords, that seems enough to keep my brain from erasing them. I don't think it's really possible to capture a scene in text. The text only serves as memory aid.
To add, it helps to have some record of inner thoughts to look back and reflect with greater fidelity than memory.
Done enough, one can start to make connections at a greater rate than if one was to try to keep it all in one's head. I've had several experiences in therapy where I had the spontaneous thought, "I've written about this before!" I was able to go back and thread through all previous reflections in a way that was much more than the sim of their parts. It really accelerates self discovery and growth.
On a similar note - I often have the sense that I'm a very different person today than I was in the past.
Reading old writing of mine is fascinating, because it will sometimes confirm this - I often have very different beliefs - but it also shows how similarly my thought processes were in the past.
I do recommend it, with the caveat that if you journaled during dark times, don't reread those parts if you're struggling again. Can be contagious.
